“Then David said to his son, Solomon, ‘Be firm and steadfast. Go to work without fear or discouragement, for the Lord, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or abandon you before you have completed all the work for the service of the house of the Lord.’” 1 Chr 28:20
When my second son began preschool, an experience relished by his five brothers, his reaction was less than enthusiastic. As we approached the brightly painted door that led to his classroom, I felt myself being pulled backward by the pressure of his tiny hand tugging on mine.
Looking down I saw the big brown eyes welling up with tears, a look of fear crossing his flushed face. A kindly, gray-haired woman came out and wrapped her arm around his shoulder, ushering him in to join the other children. As he turned to look at me with wide doe-eyes I was sure the lump in my throat would choke me. I waited for the inevitable with baited breath.
“MOMEEE!” came the blood-curdling scream. It wasn’t so much the word as the
impassioned, gut-wrenching way in which it was delivered that pierced my heart as I tore myself away, leaving him there in the obviously adequate care of his teacher.
New beginnings were not his cup of tea.
And so it is for many of us, even as adults. New beginnings, while often exciting and challenging, also signify endings. With each new beginning we are called to give up the security and comfort of old ways to move forward into the unknown. Even routine, boring or painful daily experiences may be difficult to relinquish because they have become an anchor holding us in place.
Famed author and Christian apologist C.S. Lewis uses a familiar analogy to explain the need for change: “It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.”
During a conversation with a young man who wished to follow Jesus, but only after the young man had returned home to say good-bye to his family, Jesus explains the importance of letting go of the past: “No one who sets a hand to the plow and looks to what was left behind is fit for the kingdom of God.”
Jesus was not saying, as it may seem, that the past is something to be forgotten or ignored, but rather, that when the time comes for a decision to be made for the future, the past must take its place as the port from which one sails.
To continue to look back may prevent us from making what one Bible commentary refers to as an “instant decision of purpose” – the kind we must make when God calls us to something new and, often, something frightening.
There are, of course, times when change is not just a matter of decision. It is thrust upon us without warning and without our input. We lose a job, a home or a loved one, and our world comes undone. There is an enormous change that may seem, understandably, insurmountable.
For many people, the most difficult change is one from which none of us can escape – aging. With every new ache or pain, illness or medication we are reminded that,
physically, we are not the same person we used to be.
How do we deal with changes that threaten our peace of mind and heart? This first step is acknowledging that change is the way of life. We cannot escape it, but we can learn from it.
In truth, the most difficult and painful of changes offer the most opportunity for transformation, giving rise to resiliency, flexibility, patience, wisdom and a growing courage.
Those of us who become caretakers of an aging, sick or dying loved one, are just one example of this, often discovering a strength we did not know we had.
Life is changed and so are we, hopefully for the better.
I have found that in moving through the ebb and flow of our lives, we discover that our security is not found in the comfort of the status-quo, but rather in our own strength.
For me, courage and strength come from my faith in God.
And, by the way, my second son who was terrified of preschool, became a teacher.